Falling Up

This week, I am continuing to read some of the books I chose for this project.  Over the weekend I read The Five Dysfunctions of a Team,  by Patrick Lencioni which is a quick read and a great story. It illustrates the challenges of being a leader (or facilitator) of a struggling team very accurately.  I’d be surprised if there’s anyone who could read it without finding parallels between the story and one’s own team experiences.   To go along with it, I got the facilitator’s guide to the book, which I’ve thumbed through in hopes of using some of the models and activities for my conflict workshop.   I’ve also started Building Conflict Competent Teams by Craig Runde and Tim Flanagan.  I still have several books to go.   I’m starting to hear some repeat info and I’m not sure I’ll need to read all of these books in their entirety, but honestly I really enjoy reading about this stuff!

I also must say that one of the most useful resources I’ve found is a blog by Tammy Lenski called “Conflict Zen”.  Lenski is currently blogging about the 7 habits of reaching your ‘conflict zen’ and her habits are very practical and easy to understand.  I highly recommend her.  I particularly enjoyed/learned from her post on kicking the criticism habit.  While offering constructive criticism can be…constructive, we also often get into the habit of offering criticism without good cause.  She points out how destructive this can be and often harms or ends relationships.  It’s a good series.  Check it out:  www.conflictzen.com.

Aside from reading, I’ve started to get my ducks in a row for my workshop.  I have to admit this is much harder than I thought.  I had a very linear way of thinking about this project, but I’m finding it hard to work in a linear fashion.  My intention was to review some theories and develop a basis for my workshop, then design the instructional strategies, then put together the “package” that is my product.  Instead, I am working on the final presentations first, after going around in circles with the other 2 items.  I will work on theories later.  I never liked theory much. 

The good news is that my boss at my internship has given me the go-ahead to present the workshop in late March and April, so I now have 2 engagements on the books!  I think the deadlines will help me make some decisions and move forward! I’ve begun my powerpoint (short and sweet!) and have started pouring over initiatives and activities to make the workshop engaging.  I haven’t found one that I love yet, but there is no shortage of options so I will keep looking.  By my next post, I hope to have completed some major steps.  There- I put it in writing, so there’s no going back now…

First, I want to thank Erica for kindly responding to my last post. Apparently the little red spots on my cluster map are those of non-repeat visitors, sadly, because Erica was the only one who offered her 2 cents on my Conflict Resolution question: what would you want to know about conflict if you were attending a workshop? Luckily, it isn’t too late. So if you have stumbled across this blog accidently, never to return again, I hope you’ll still take a couple seconds to leave me a comment about this.

For this week, I wanted to offer some musings on my readings for this semester. I am really excited about the books I have lined up to read. I just really enjoy them. They are insightful and very applicable. I have started with one that my boss at my internship suggested: So Smart, But…  by Allen N. Weiner.  Weiner is a corporate trainer who writes anecdotally about communication gaffs that he encounters with his clients.  The chapters talk about folks who are “so smart but: don’t get it, lacks energy and passion, can’t tailor the message to the audience and so on.  He argues that to be credible, one must be competent, composed, have character, be sociable and extroverted and caring (Weiner, 2007) and offers his advice on how to deliver a message that shows you are credible and overcomes the “buts”. 

Before I started reading, I presumed that my boss gave me this book to read in order to plan better for my clients in terms of THEIR needs.  I now realize he’s given me some excellent information on how I can be successful in delivering a credible message in the workshop I am creating.  I think that I do some of Weiner’s tips already.  I think I am good at getting a feel for what an audience wants or needs to hear me say.  I think I am receptive.  I tend to notice if people are not “getting it” and I need to explain something differently.  I think I make points in an organized fashion and try to use breadth, depth, height and sight when promoting an argument. 

Where I think the book will be most helpful for me is the “but” that reads “So Smart, but Lacks an Executive Presence”.  I have mentioned before that I am a bit anxious about my lack of experience and my desire to get out there and do stuff!  Well, this is the semester of DOING, so I get my chance.  Whatever the book can tell me about appearing the part and mustering up the confidence to work with high level execs and the like, I will read it with open ears and mind.  I’m not at that chapter yet, but will keep you posted.

In the meantime, if you are someone who frequently makes presentations, or if your superiors sometimes suggest that you are lacking something in your communication style, I would recommend the book.  It’s an easy, entertaining yet very helpful book. 

In other news,  I have officially taken on a separate “pro-bono” facilitation job with the client I worked with last semester in my Consulting Skills class.  I will be facilitating a meeting with a QI group that is trying to re-define itself.  I am very excited as it looks like I will get a chance to use some Future Search and Appreciative Inquiry strategies from last spring.  I’ll update on that in the coming weeks as well.  Wish me luck!

It’s been a while since I’ve written for my blog. I didn’t post over all of winter break, and I’ve gone almost a month into the spring semester without writing as well. Tonight, I decided that the blog might help me clear some cobwebs out of my head. You see, this is my last semester of school! I will graduate (let’s pray) this May. For my final semester, I am doing a project which will count as the equivalent of my thesis. I am doing this project through an internship I’ve gotten for the semester. My plan for the project was to create a conflict resolution workshop that was experiential in nature. By experiential, I mean that I hope to draw on my work as a teambuilding facilitator and create a workshop that is not a lecture, but an interactive experience (tying in, of course, many of the things I have learned in my Adult Learning classes!).

So far, my internship has been interesting. I am working with a company that does training, facilitation and consulting for businesses. My role is varied. Some days I help with the logistics, setting up for trainings, cleaning up, assisting participants, etc. Other days I’ve gotten to sit in on some meetings with clients, seeing how programs are designed specifically for clients’ needs. I will get to do a bit of facilitation as time goes on. But the main part of my internship will be creating a conflict resolution module. This was my original idea for a final project, but as it turns out, my supervisor is interested in having a conflict resolution module available at the center as well! This means that if I am able to successfully create this module/workshop, I will get a chance to practice running it with some clients.

I chose this project, by the way, because ultimately I’d like to find myself doing consulting or training. I like the teambuilding/organizational development side of conflict resolution because it attempts to address issues BEFORE the conflict, as opposed to mediation, which is after the fact. I’m all in favor of preventing the conflict whenever possible! Also, I love organizing and planning things, so creating this workshop also fulfills that desire.

So what are the cobwebs? Well, I am working somewhat independently on this, and I’m having a hard time figuring out where to start. Some questions that I am researching and writing about are: what do people want to know about conflict? What do they need “training” in and what skills or info is useful? What theoretical approach do I want to take? I am re-reading some of my CR books from my 1st year of grad school, and I am beginning to find answers to these questions. The lack of structure (no formal classroom time) means I have to pace myself appropriately, especially here at the beginning, to make sure I complete everything in time.

I’m going to go out on a limb here, and say that based on the little red dots on my cluster map, people DO occasionally find this blog, and hopefully they read it and aren’t just mistakenly directed here. So, I am asking any of you readers to consider the following, and post me a comment. If you had to attend a workshop or training on conflict resolution, what would you want to know? What skills would you want to learn? What would make it useful and worthwhile? If you are in fact a CR practitioner, mediator or facilitator, any advice you have would be helpful too. Any thoughts are appreciated.

Sincerely, your typical struggling grad student…Carmen