Falling Up

I just checked, and it appears I’ve already been graded for my blog participation this semester, but I just feel weird about not posting a final post.  I need some closure, people!

I think ADLT623 (org learning) has been one of the most interesting courses I’ve taken.  I think I say that every semester.  But truly, given the current business atmosphere, the information was so timely and the discussions were so rich!  We had our very own case study, unfortunately.   I usually classify courses into “information based” or “skill based”; you learn stuff, or you learn how to DO stuff.  This was more of the information based kind…I learned lots of great stuff, but…what do you do with it, other than write analysis papers?  I am grateful that I took it at the same time as my Consulting Skills course.  The combination of learning about how organizations learn and grow, and how culture shapes those efforts came into play as I’ve gone through my consulting project, where I’m exploring how an organization can learn…and grow…  What a great overlap! It’s nice to have new knowledge and skills that I can not only use in the future, but, tomorrow too.

The downside of learning all of this is the discontent it sets in my head whenever I see my own company acting in disfunctional, anti-learning ways. But I recognize that while I am a part of that culture, I can choose which part I am.  Erica said it better in her blog, about being a rock in the stream and letting some of what happens rush by.  I can’t say I’m looking forward to fighting the good fight at my organization, but I can say I’m prepared.

I just wanted to share that I had my teambuilding session today with my consulting project clients, and it was a success!  My definition of success?  I went in prepared, I was comfortable and confident about the planned activities, the participants were engaged, the dialogue was open and thoughtful, the feedback I received was useful and meaningful, and the clients were very satisfied, it seems.   A highlight for me was that, at the end of the program, a participant told me that I seem like I’ve been facilitating my whole life.  That was great to hear!   I also enjoyed tying in aspects of Appreciative Inquiry and other change strategies (think: lots of sticky notes on the walls) and engaging in some collective meaning-making.  Best of all, the participants seem to have left with several new ideas of how they can work more collaboratively, which is their goal. 

I have already identified some things I could have done differently or better.  The main critique is that participants indicated that they would’ve enjoyed learning more about their co-workers that they don’t know much about.  I did some ”get to know you” activities in the beginning, but decided to cut one due to a time shortage that I perceived.  Based on the feedback, I should’ve left the activity, as it would’ve met a very basic desire of the group.

But overall, I’m happy.  I feel successful, and it was fun.  AND, I can move on to the feedback meeting now…hooray!

Here are some glimpses of the day…

“Team Write”:  each group had to write a section of an Emerson quotation using this crazy device that looks simultaneously like a jellyfish and a pineapple slice. 

Here are all of the groups’ portions of the 2 quotations by Emerson.  They read:

“Do not be too timid and squeamish.  All of life is an experiment.  The more experiments you make, the better.”

“Not in his goals but in his transitions is man great.” 

And now for some collective meaning-making…        

I believe this is my last night of reading for this class!  I’m on the couch, reading tomorrow’s homework and catching up on any readings I missed over the semester… I’ve really enjoyed Block’s book this semester.  It has spoken to me both professionally and personally.  I find that a lot of what he says is applicable to me just as ME:  a person, not a consultant.

I’ll share a silly but relevant anecdote that is somewhat personal, but I have a feeling I’m safe here on my blog!  Over the weekend, I had a date.  It was a 2nd date with a very lovely person.  However, I was pretty sure going into this date that I was not really “connecting” with this person.  The evening was fairly awkward, and while we chatted and had a nice time, there was definitely no sign that this relationship was going anywhere.  Later in the evening, we joined some of my friends at a holiday party.  My date left separately, and my friends immediately began asking me what I was thinking dating this guy, since he was clearly not a good match for me.  I gave some excuses and defenses, some of which were just sort of funny quips (due to my need to relieve stress after a long, awkward date!)

Enough of my personal life folks!  The point of the story is that I spent the whole evening (and the evening of the 1st date as well) feeling VERY inauthentic.  I wasn’t myself, I couldn’t quite say what I wanted to say.  What bothered me more about my behavior was that when questioned by my friends, I wish I’d been more authentic then.  While my quips about my date weren’t mean-spirited, they didn’t reflect what I really felt, which was this was a very nice man who simply is not right for me.

I feel very silly writing a blog post about this!  But, this is probably my last “What I’m Learning” blog post, and Block gets a bit sentimental in his last chapters too.  He makes an excellent point that consulting requires both the head and the heart.  Flawless consulting is authentic.  It requires doing the right things.  It requires peeling the onion,  discovering the real issues and being of service to others.  I see so much parallel between his advice and just being a decent human being.  I think the book will stick in my head for a long time… I mean, if I was thinking about Block while on a date, then it’s definitely made an imprint!

This has been a busy semester.  In my personal life, it’s been a long year, and a bit of a stressful one.  I am happy to finish up this semester and relax while enjoying the holidays with my family.  I’m looking forward to 2009…. I was thinking about New Years’ resolutions earlier today, and I have a feeling that I’ll be basing some of mine on what I’ve learned from Block and in class this semester.  Wish me luck…

For this week, I want to reflect on a conversation I had with my boss this past Friday night.  He has heard me ramble on about org culture/learning all semester, and is generally used to me spouting Adult Learning stuff during staff meetings.  But Friday, after the rush died down in the dining room, we each had a glass of wine and chatted about the restaurant for a while.  I ended up talking about Schein’s thoughts on how the owner/founder is the person who initially forms and creates an org’s culture, and that beyond that beginning, it becomes very hard to change a culture.  I have been at the restaurant for almost 14 of its 22 years, and he and I are probably the 2 that have exerted the most effort for the longest time to “fix” the things we don’t like.

Let me pause for a second and say that I haven’t painted the store in the best light in class.  But, it is actually a very successful restaurant, sales-wise, but also successful in terms of having extremely devoted regulars, great food (in my opinion), AND it’s clean, which is hard to come by.  So despite my griping, the restaurant isn’t a bad place at all.  Our complaints are mostly due to the fact that while we have a fun, loving staff, we are a bit lax with them, and so we’ve got a culture that lets people off the hook too easily, which creates a chaotic environment and somewhat lazy workers.  Specifically, I am in charge of the waitstaff, who for the most part are decent.  But because we never really fire someone unless they don’t show up, steal or some other egregious offense, we have a lot of B- servers where we should really have all A+ servers at this point.

The owner and I discussed how he and his business partner didn’t really intentionally create some parts of the culture, so that without a plan for certain things, our culture has some elements that have sort of created themselves.  These parts of our culture are the ones that frustrate us:  the ones we didn’t plan for, but that are  very dysfunctional.  We don’t know how to un-create them.  We discussed that really, it isn’t the problem, but how it’s managed, which stinks because um….we’re the two that manage them.  Sigh…

And for me personally, that has been the pit in my stomach all semester: I’ve learned all of this a bit too late.  I told the owner that if I had never worked there, and came in today with what I’ve learned, it might even be easier to change things that way than to try to un-learn and un-do everything I’ve done in the last 14 years.  Jointly we acknowledge that we’ve made TONS of improvement, even in the last 3 to 5 years, and we are proud of those changes, but that it really is supremely hard to tame this beast.  Schein was not kidding about how hard it is. 

My plans now are to be “retired” from the restaurant by March.  I feel already a little defeated, especially anytime I have to remind a server for the 1.5 millionth time to give a customer a wine menu.  My goal now is to use as much as I’ve learned before I leave to push the waitstaff even just the slightest bit closer to our goal.   I realize that 5 months isn’t much time, but I will be satisfied if I can carry out the steps flawlessly, as Peter Block says, even if mountains don’t move.

I just finished my Block chapters for tomorrow’s class, and they’ve gotten me all worked up.  I will never fall asleep tonight…

I was reading the chapters on engagement and implementation.  I think Block makes a great point that the stages of implementation have gotten almost cliched.  It does seem like the last few years have brought on an onslaught of mission and vision statements and motivational speeches from the owner and like, 500 new books on leadership, change management and the like.  I can see the cartoon of the proud business CEO offering a motivational talk while the rest of the staff groans.   It really does seem like consultants may simply be peddling the wares of the week, so to speak. 

For me, this is distressing because I’m still new at this, and vision statements and all that still seem really useful to me as far as actual activities and implementation goes.  I want to avoid doing what Block describes:  prescribing this sort of generic recommendation that everyone gets that not only may not work, but may in fact work against the very thing you’re trying to do!  I can even see it in my own thoughts with my consulting project- my first inclination is to assume some type of teambuilding activity (my background, of couse) would be helpful (although not a solution) and since taking ADLT 625 last semester, I’ve been all about processes like Future Search, AI, Open Space, etc.  So, even as a novice I already have my “favorites’ in terms of things I’d like to see implemented.  These chapters really helped me remember that perpetual recurring theme for me:  slow down, take a good look, and see what’s really happening in order to find out what’s really needed.  And, ask lots of questions.

Well friends, I have now received 2 completed questionnaires and have held 2 interviews for my consulting project.  I have 2 more interviews set up, and am still waiting to hear back from the rest.  I have already learned a LOT about consulting and about the “problem” I am facing.

In my second interview, I spoke to a staff member who is fairly high up on the food chain, so to speak.  We chatted for about an hour, and from him I gained two things:  1: some insight into Consulting.  2:  His own agenda for me.  First, he was quite open about understanding what I was experiencing as a new consultant, and offered me some good advice as we talked.  Actually, it threw me off a bit at first, because I wasn’t trying to act like a student imitating a consultant, I was trying to just be the consultant.  But it felt a bit like a dress rehearsal, because at times he would interject to offer his thoughts on how I was consulting.  While unnerving, it ended up being very helpful, and I did appreciate his insight, especially because I have a lot more interviews to do! Specifically, I had a hard time not mentioning things others had said already.  Not in the sense that I was gossiping, but part of me felt like I should connect things that people said.  In this particular case, the person was saying very similar things as the person I’d interviewed earlier that day.  So I would note these things as being shared by the other person.  For the record, they were positive things.  I certainly know better than to repeat negative information!  Either way, my interviewee correctly informed me that I might refrain from referring to others’ interviews in the future.   This was a bit embarrassing, and I knew what I was doing in saying what I said, but his point is still well taken. 

The other point he made that was helpful was in terms of the problem itself.  Now, he was just my 2nd interview, so who knows what will come up in later ones.  But his opinion is that, while I am tasked with examining the relationship between X and Y, it may be that there is more happening within sub-cultures of Y.  This theory sounds likely based on the little bit I’ve discovered so far.  If I continue to see this idea come up in interviews, it will definitely put a twist on what the contracting clients “know” the problem to be and how I present recommendations.

Lastly, this particular client seemed to have his own interests in having me as a consultant.  He questioned whether there wasn’t room for me to work on several other issues within the organization that don’t seem to be related to the current one.  Towards the end, he mentioned that if I encounter trouble in tying his ideas in to my recommendations, to let him know.  To me, that seemed strange; I’m not sure that his suggestions would factor into my recommendations at all, since they are on a completely different topic.  I am happy to say that I think I responded authentically.   I noted his ideas, stated that I did not see that they fit well with this current project, but that they certainly sounded like topics that could use some fruitful discussion. 

Dealing with a higher-up staff person early in the process really made me consider what kinds of information these people can offer. While they may not be privvy to the intimate details of the conflict, they are quite handy at providing big-picture, contextual information that helps frame the conflict in terms of something larger.  I am looking forward to the next few chats as I continue to flesh out my understanding of the issues.

Well, I am just about to send out my first email to begin gathering data from the employees of my client company.  Woo-hoo!  As I mentioned in my last post, I feel like this will definitely be a good 50/50 partnership, and the evidence is that my 2 contracting clients have been very prompt to provide me with names and contact information, to introduce me electronically to their staff and explain what I am doing, and to look over my draft email and survey and to offer their edits and opinions on what I’m sending out.  I am very grateful to have such cooperative clients!  Further, the edits offered were genuinely helpful, and not just ones that make them look better or avoid sticky conversations.  I sense a real desire to fix the problem!

I was hoping that someone from ADLT 610 or Dr. Carter might review my survey/email before I sent it out.  That’s definitely one downfall of not having a partner on this project.  (hint hint, if you’re reading this, I’ve posted them on the wiki!)  But I do want to send them out soon, so I may not wait since I’ve at least had three people from the client company okay the documents.

My data gathering includes emails/phone calls/in person conversations with about 15 people that my contracting clients have deemed “important to talk to”.  These are people with either an historical perspective of the relationship in question, an active role working between the 2 departments, or some other perspective that is useful.  My clients brainstormed this list in front of me, and I was glad to see that they included a diverse group of people- by diverse, I mean that they selected all levels of employees, both insiders and outsiders.  I think that the information I receive from these folks should be very useful.

The second part of my data gathering will happen on Dec. 10th, when I will facilitate 4 hours of teambuilding mixed with a little future search-y activities.  I am designing this to be more data gathering and not as a solution, but I have no doubt that it will probably (hopefully?) serve as a little of both.  The idea for the client at least is that from this 12/10 date and my survey data, I will compile my recommendations.   I’ll definitely be blogging more on that as it draws near!

Now I’m off to finish editing that email and hopefully send it out soon!  Wish me luck.

I am a little behind, I’m afraid, on this blog, but better late than never.  Between the 2 classes I have with Dr. Carter, 610 seems to be my red-headed step child in terms of blogging.  (We actually discussed this in 623 last night…how those of us in both classes do more blogging for 623 than 610…)  I do have some thoughts to jot down regarding my contracting meeting for our consulting project.

My client is a local service agency/non-profit, and they are quite excited to have a free consultant.  So far, they’ve been quite cooperative and understanding of what I can and cannot do for this assignment.   And one of the two people actually has some familiarity with Schein, so this is not at all new to her.  Best yet, they are both open to the idea that they may be part of the problem!  Bring on the data collection!

I actually had 2 contracting meetings.  For the first meeting, I met with just my initial contact, and I think I followed the steps Block outlines quite well.  I got her to condense the problem to a one sentence statement, which helped immensely, and I gave her my expectations and wants, and solicited hers as well.  I was particularly happy that one of her “wants” was that I would be very open and frank with her, including feeling free to relay any negative feedback I received regarding her.  She seems very open to changing her own behaviors if they seem to be contributing to the problem.  I suppose we’ll see if that really happens!

We agreed that we probably needed to meet again with her counterpart so that all three of us are on the same page, and to gather his insights about the problem.   That was our second contracting meeting, and the new person added a good deal of insight to the problem (I liked that he preferred to call it an “opportunity” rather than a problem!) as well as his own wants for me and for the project.  We all agreed that we should be frank and open about this endeavor, and I definitely feel like it will be a 50/50 partnership.

I think the contracting meeting(s) went well.  Then again, don’t we all until an issue arises?  I’ll be curious to see if there is anything I left out that will come back to haunt me.  So far, I feel good about this partnership.

Ughhh… what a week.  I think my professors have conspired to make the next couple weeks until Thanksgiving as hectic as possible.  This week alone I have 2 group presentations, a paper, a journal entry and 2 blogs (and 1 mirror response)…. and that doesn’t include reading for all three classes.  Sigh.  I am falling drastically behind.  Ironically, in my Group Counseling class, we’ve been running mock support groups on “Stress Management” and one of the recurring themes for me in those sessions has been my lack of sleep. I have been trying to do better about getting more than my average 5-6 hours a night so that I don’t feel so unhealthy so often.  But tonight, it’s midnight and I still have a LOT to do!  I think my support group is causing MORE stress in that it simply raises my awareness of how much stress I’m under this semester.  In that case, ignorance was bliss.

Anyway, this has been “one of those weeks” at work where nothing goes right.  And I am, for sure, part of the problem.  Worse, it is a conflict resolution type of problem, which is my “specialty”, so to speak, and I am still not having much success with it.  The basic gist of it is that my co-worker calls out sick quite frequently, and I am always the one expected to cover for her.  At this point, after so many sick calls from her, we are somewhat skeptical about the nature of her “sickness”…it seems to be that she only gets sick on weekends…hmmm…  Because I am crazily busy this semester, I can’t usually cover for her…which isn’t really my responsibility anyway, but I had offered to pick up shifts if I can.  That’s enough background for now.  The long and short of it is that I feel like she thinks I’m not pulling my weight, and that I get special treatment, and I feel like she is NOT SICK every other Saturday ( I mean, please…) and that she is misunderstanding my position at the store (which is slightly different than the other managers’ positions).

Now, I am somehow engaged in a silent battle against this person.  By silent, I mean that although there is a very large elephant in the room, I have reverted to my childhood tendency to not say a word when I am angry.  And if you know me at all, you’ll recognize what a feat this is.  For whatever reason, I’ve always become very quiet when I’m upset.  I feel like a 5 year old though, because I am well-versed in all of the correct ways to handle conflict assertively, but really, I just want to throw a hissy fit with her.  And since I can’t, I’ve hardly said 3 words to her in as many shifts.  Sigh…It’s much easier to be a conflict expert when it’s someone else’s conflict!

At least it has been interesting to observe my own behavior in this conflict.  I am aware that I am defensive, nervous, feeling attacked and frustrated.  I am aware that I think I have done what I am supposed to do and all that I could do, and have acknowledged when I could have done more.  I’ve caught myself going up the ladder of inference, and have made myself come back down.  At least I’m learning something.

I was really looking forward to having a productive dialogue Friday at our weekly managers’ meeting, and resolving this conflict, but the meeting got postponed.  That’s definitely part of our culture- to delay important conversations.  And even though I am acknowledging that I am giving my co-worker the silent treatment currently, I did NOT want to postpone that meeting!  I was ready to have some dialogue and discuss the issues, but no one else wanted to set aside time for the meeting.  I think that’s when I became nervous and defensive- when I lost that controlled space to discuss things rationally.  Now I don’t know when it will come up or if it will, which definitely triples the stress level…

This post is long and rambling, I realize, but my last thought is related to our cultural analysis paper… I’m aware that this person is fairly new to our store, and she clashes in many ways with our culture.  In this conflict we’re having, I’ve recognized that part of it stems from her reacting to our culture and not liking a lot of what she sees.  It’s definitely true that when someone “different” comes into a culture, you can see elements (artifacts, espoused values) a lot more clearly. 

Reading Chapters 8-11 in Schein reminded me of a course I took during my undergrad studies.  I majored in International Relations, with a focus in international communication, and a required course was Cross-Cultural Communications.  There was also a follow up course in Intercultural Communications.  The first course was amazing…. and covered a lot of the aspects of culture that Schein touches on:  time, space, relationships and so on.  The professor had done quite a bit of traveling as well as a good deal of negotiating internationally. He was chock full of anecdotes about the tricky business of understanding those cultural differences in his work.

 (La Boca, Buenos Aires, Argentina)

I took the course right after I had studied abroad in Argentina for a semester.  That trip abroad was my first time traveling out of the country, and I was terribly, horribly ill when I first arrived in country.  I would attend classes during the week, but it seemed like by the time Thursday and Friday rolled around, I would get sick with these terrible stomach pains.  For the first 4 weekends, I laid in bed.  My host mother must’ve thought I was dying.  One weekend, a study abroad friend insisted that I join them for a night of dancing. I went reluctantly, and never felt sick again.

When I returned again and took the Cross Cultural Communications course, the professor talked at length about culture- and reverse culture- shock.  I learned that one of the results of culture shock is often physical stress.   I had essentially made myself sick with homesickness and culture shock in Argentina, and it wasn’t until I began to get out there and emerge myself in the culture that I began to feel better.  I wish I’d known that before the trip!

I remember the professor saying that it isn’t so much learning the new culture that’s hard.  It’s seeing our own culture out of context, and recognizing things that we do and say, and how we act, that is strange and hard to understand.  I’ve traveled a bit since then, and it never fails that I always see some aspect of US culture in a totally different light when witnessing a different way of life.  That is why Schein’s chapters reminded me of this episode.  Beyond actually understanding cultural elements, it is often hard enough just to SEE them, to become aware of aspects of our cultural selves.  In organizational terms, it is essential to recognize these differences in work cultures… especially (in light of our study of NASA and Enron) when to fail to do so can make us sick.